Let her be elevated

I'm embedding this in my 'Visual Cliff' on the right. Listen, Live, Learn.

The Thickness - Jill Scott

Whoa!

She a big chick,

Big ol' legs,

Big ol' thighs,

Big ol' hips,

Big ol' ass,

Big ol' tits,

She so big!

Won't nobody even try to reach her mind

Age 14,

Eyes green,

Young tender, supple, and fine,

Hear them,

all those oohs and ahhs slip as she lick her lips,

Oh, they want to fuck her,

They want to rub their dicks on her precious clitoris,

They want to watch them big ol titties settle and part a bit,

They want to talk about it,

Tell it,

Spread it,

Relive the conquest,

How they beat on that ass and how the knock that shit,

Don't stop,

Won't stop,

To recognize that there's more,

More underneath that thickness,

That sweet and round brown young tender thickness,
Now they like her quiet and eager,

Sweet and meager,

Shhhhh!

Don't you complain about my other women,

Just drop that big thick ass on my stiffness,

Make me nut all up on your gut with the quickness,

Don't stop,

Won't stop,

Lift it,

Yea girl lift it,

Lift it baby,

Drop it again,

Cause I aint your tribesmen no more,

I aint your friend,

Come on girl just let me in,

Let me into all that thickness,

That sweet and round brown supple bigness,

Cause she so big won't nobody even try to reach her mind,

She's been degraded, exploited, NOT celebrated,

Saturated with self hatred,

Let me say that again please:

She's been degraded, exploited, NOT celebrated,

Saturated with self hatred,

Cause every time she turns on the TV,

What does she see? big ol' booty,

And it don't have nothing to do with the song,

Thus, her definition of beauty,

Thus, her definition of beauty,

Oh, oh, oh Lord,

Oh Lord,

Oh Lord,

Let her,

Let her recognize the magnificence you've created,

Lift her,

Lift her,

Lift her,
Let her be elevated,

Let her be elevated,

Lord, Lord,

Let her be elevated,

Let her be elevated,

Cause she is so big,

She so big,

She so big,

She so big,

She so big,

She so big,

She so big,

She so big,
Let her be elevated,

Let her be elevated.

Posts from the BB

My musical education began a little later in life than most people. Mainly because radio and TV weren't uppermost in my life. I mean money was tight so for a while I did without and when it finally happened I found myself trying to catch up.

For a few years in High School I pretended to know what everyone was talking about, pretended I recognized both local and international musician and musicians. Eventually I caught up with some but my knowledge has large caverns of empty space when it comes to popular music.

I've reconciled with the fact that I do have a lot to learn when it comes to music but I couldn't care less really about what anyone else thinks. I do this for me because I don't want to have missed out on good music, so I've spent many a hour watching, listening and reading up on acts and bands from the past getting caught up on what I've missed. Its hard though, rifling through the crap that people record but sometimes I discover a rare gem.

I also love discovering amazing acts that a lot of people don't know about. Makes me feel like they're just performing for me. Acts like Janelle Monae (who has/is being catapulted into stardom and well deserved too) Paolo Nutini (who's really big in Europe)

Where's this post going? I don't know my initial intention was to write about all the old Kings of Leon songs I discovered that are amazing (I did not know the 'On Call' was theirs). I love music, love musicians they're creativity blows my mind. I can't wait to continue my discoveries. So I guess I'm just gonna end it there.

I asked him once
what he saw as he
slid from on top of me
Was he seeing my worth?
Was he seeing my girth?
Or was he lost in amazing experience
we'd just shared.

Did he see my sweat
or just my sweet...ness
Is it anything like his dream
his dream girl?
Has he already forgotten what we are like
together
those promises of 'you the best' and 'love it'
have they faded?

What is he seeing just above me
or below me
at the 126 degree angles
As I raise my head and whisper
Does he hear the implied 'I love you'?
What about the morning?
What evils does it bring
along with the light
as the cover of night
that masks guarded eyes
lifts.

I asked him once
what he saw as he
became apart of me
what visions came forth was we shudder
together.
"Life... I see life"


It's not perfect and
It's not what I expect
but what makes it memorable
is that he says it with this look
the look that makes me know
what Ive shared is reciprocated
i can rest
assured that this
love is just a beginning
THE beginning.

Posts from the BB

At night we would watch the stars
And he would physically give me each and every one
I felt like cayenne pepper,red,hot,spicy
I felt Dizzy, Sonya, heaven, and Miles between my thighs
Better than love,we made delicious
He me had,had me he
He made me tongue tied
I could hear his rhythm in my thoughts
I was his sharp, his horn section
His boom and his bip
And he was my love

Excerpt from "Love Rain" by Jill Scott

What is it that you notice about a lovers body? I feel weird sometimes mentioning that I notice their hands. And shoulders. And waist. Its all gorgeous to me. The way they smile whether its naughty or sweet or content. Its the slight shudder when you nip their shoulder letting them know everything they're doing is just right. I don't know. Its about closing your eyes and only seeing their face, not having to imagine anyone or any vibrating thing else. Its the eskimo kisses and greeting the sunlight together. I don't want to feel embarrassed about what I've shared with someone else, or feel like I'm the only sentimental bitch around. I treasure those memories they multiplied that intensity for me. Seeing my exes happy makes me happy I'm not the jealous girl...ok not jealous much especially not over a guy. I just want everyone to be happy once that happens the worlds a better place. I miss the intimacies and the friendships but I don't miss the created drama or the insecurities. I miss seeing the shoulders in the morning. Miss the smiles. Miss the shared experiences. Miss our shared breath.

"Breathe You In" by Mia Carruthers

I am undone
A little rough around the edges
Hearing stories of the hours past
And the hour glass we raised
The one I tried to chase
We talk too much

A million words
Meaning nothing at all
Telling stories of nothing real
It's never how we feel
And they say time is how we heal

I can't see you can't breathe you in no
If I do I'd never leave again

Oh again I love the concrete
It's my city grass beneath my feet
And walks with strangers
Hundreds of years
My senior

It's not that I can relate
It's just the little things that make me hate
The age I am
And the way we are
And it all comes back to

I can't see you
I can't breathe you in no
If I do I'd never leave again

I can't see you no
I can't breathe you in
If I do I'd never leave again
Oh again
If I breathe you in

Written in Memo

While washing plates and singing along to 'Blame it on me' by Chrisette Michele I thought about relationships (nothing new) and I came to a realization. One which made me laugh out loud thinking about it.

Here it is, no matter how much I may think I want a relationship with someone I truly don't have the emotional capacity to feel anything for anyone right now. Truly all I want is to hit it and quit it. I don't have the time, energy or even inclination to want to spend time with another person. Its so much work trying to mesh your lives, personalities and complexities. I talk about wanting the *love* but I'm perfectly happy with what I've got right now.

It was hilarious to me because I've always been the commitment advocate. Always been the one who wanted more than a mere fuck stop. I've become so cynical though that I've found myself not believing in my own bull. Maybe in a few months or years i'll feel differently but I can't see myself with someone right now. They'll get annoying, i'll get bitchy and sarcastic and what was 'like' turns into intense dislike. I don't want that. I'd rather just enjoy one ride on the roller coaster then we can move on. I just don't feel I can love that person the way they deserve to be loved.

This is kinda sad coming from me but I kept trying to think where will I put this person? Which part of my life can this puzzle piece fit and the answer was clear. The puzzle right now is complete and there's just no room for it. I see that puzzle piece as belonging to another puzzle, another lifetime, just not my life. I have so much else to worry about that I don't have time to worry about another person. I don't want an open relationship either. Emotions get involved in all relationships whatever the moniker and that's a tangled web that can lead to possibly more bullshit.

Of course I want some type of more than friend companionship but I know I can't handle it and I would never want to hurt someone else because of my current inability to give my all completely.

Also don't get it twisted I'm not talking about promiscuity or being unsafe. Always, always wear a condom. Be safe, be protected even if you're partner isn't prepared make sure you are. Remember STDs are and always have been preventable diseases.

Title Pic -

Photo credit

Officially...

Officially I'm not in a relationship with another person. Officially it sucks sometimes to be single. Unofficially I am as happy as can be as I look at myself in the mirror and smile. Realizing my current love story is with myself. Realizing that the adoration in eyes is from within and I'm loving myself more each day. It's a revelation really. I'm thanking God I had the opportunity to discover that self love finally. It's a beautiful thing.

It's Valentine's Day. I sent a message to some friends wishing them a happy one. I attached 'Because you're loved' on the end because I wanted them to know that it wasn't just superficial greetings. It was a heartfelt wish for them to know that there is at least one other person in this universal plain that loves them.

Below is a song by Floetry....the video is can be found here. Listen to it. Read the lyrics feel the passion and sensuality and pain and love. I may not be the biggest Valentine's Day fan but love is glorious and who am I to hate on a day that purports to celebrate it?

"Getting Late" By Floetry

Baby

Ooo baby

baby,baby

ooo um baby

oh baby

[1st Verse (Natalie Talking)]

We need to um talk about where

We're taking this thing.
How far we're gonna let this go.

We've been here before.

Its getting late.

[Chorus 1 (Marsha Singing)]

It's getting late.

Why you gotta be here?

Beside me.

Watching, needing, wanting me.

I'm afraid, (Don't Be)

I'm afraid, (Don't Be)

I'm so scared that you'll hurt me, twice.

Baby, oh baby baby baby

[2nd Verse (Natalie Talking)]

Listen, I've already been thinking about you on my mind.

Far too often for you,

To be here at this time

You see, one hands on nine and the other's on my thigh.

Look,I already played with the idea of you

Being here in the mornin

And the position for the crack of dawn

And the conversation before the yawning

But aah, it's getting late.

[Chorus 2 (Marsha Singing)]

It's getting late.

Why you gotta be here?

Beside me.

Watching, needing, wanting me.

But I'm afraid, (you say) don't be.

But I'm afraid, (you say) don't be.

I'm so scared that you'll hurt me twice.

Oh Baby baby baby

[2nd Verse (Natalie Talking)]

How's about I let you touch the space.

That you left behind,

The day that you stop smiling

The day that the tears started falling

But now were talking, touching

Almost making sensual again

We can taste the familiar,

Cause, the family hour supports it.

Of this moment,but was led by the movements cause ahh

It's getting late.

[Chorus 3 (Marsha Singing)]

It's getting late.

Why you gotta be here?

Beside me.

Watching, needing, wanting me.

But I'm afraid, (you say) don't be.

But I'm afraid, (you say) don't be.

I'm so scared that you'll hurt me twice.

Oh Baby baby baby

Oh baby twice baby baby.

[3nd Verse (Natalie Talking)]

I see the memories we replayed

Same space face bodies

I know there's a method to your manliness

but ah I'm a afraid

[Chorus 3 (Marsha Singing)]

It's getting late.

Why you gotta be here?

Beside me.

Watching, needing, wanting me.

But I'm afraid, you say don't be.

But I'm afraid, and you say don't be.

I'm afraid that you'll gonna hurt me baby, baby twice baby

[Ending Chorus 4]

I see the memories replayed, same space, same place

Same bodies baby I know this method to your manliness

But I'm afraid, babe

I see the memories replayed, same space, same place

Same bodies baby I know this method to your manliness

But I'm afraid, baby.

Posts from the BB

Every year I write a post on or around December 1st in commemoration of World AIDS Day. Here's that post written on December 1st.
--------------------------

Today’s another day that we shouldn’t have to recognize but we want to pay tribute to those persons who have succumbed and those who are living with this disease. Every person who recklessly chooses to have unprotected sex endangers all of us and this has to stop. I pray the day will come when HIV/AIDS is a disease we can say happened ‘way back when’. I long for the day when a cure is found so that we can help those now who are now living with this disease.

INTERNATIONAL HIV/AIDS STATS People living with HIV:* 33.4 million people living with HIV worldwide* 31.3 million adults* 15.7 million women* 2.1 million children under 15New HIV cases in 2008:* 2.7 million people* 2.3 million adults* 430,000 children under 15HIV-related deaths in 2008:* 2 million total death

Posts from the BB

I wrote this a few weeks ago but only now getting the opportunity to post it.
--------------------------

I wondered about the decision to write that about myself but I felt and feel that this is who I am. I was attracted to a girl. Very attracted and having made no bones about being open to having relationships with women so revealing on twitter that I found her attractive seemed like nothing to me. Only after posting it did I realize that persons may have objections or tend to look at me differently. I mean I haven’t changed but their perceptions of me will. Who am I now?As usual people don’t see me; they see fat, natural hair, crooked teeth. That’s not even an ounce of who I am. That merely measures a centimeter on my 5foot 8inch frame. A New Year begins soon and my hope for the New Year is for a world where people become more tolerant of others and themselves. Learn to accept the good with the bad and realize that being a ‘better you’ doesn’t make you better than anyone else.

Posts from the BB

I've had a few ops to sleep with ex-boyfriends. They've asked and I usually turn them down. I don't have many exes but they seem to keep coming back wanting more. I'm far from conceited (barely confident even) but I've always thought of myself as adecent catch. At least for the right guy anyway.

I wonder about their offers, thinking why am I only getting these old offers there's currently no new guy offering to do anything. What's that about? I like knowing they still want me and though I've been honest with them they keep trying. That does an ego wonders but in the same vein my ego gets shot down, every time an op is seemingly missed.

I've been laying in a bed of fantasies and memories. Emotional tangles are so hard to unravel and that's possibly the main reason I don't try to actively seek someone out. Getting dumped or dumped on is scvary shit and my fear is currently set to paralyzing when I think about relationships.

I fear commitment and rejection. These are of course the same things most people fear. I want to try to overcome them but find that being apathetic works for me right now. I want a relationship but I'm not dying to have one. If it happens it happens. Whther it be for a second or a lifetime it will happen.

P.S. - What the hell do I have to be ashamed of? I write what I feel on my blog and on twitter it's me. If you can't share that's cool and I respect that if you wish to not read my thoughts then click the lovely X found at the top right hand corner of your screen. I should do a post about the double standard when it pertains to sexual exploits. As a blogger I write about what's in my mind needing to get out at that moment so if I'm feeling the need to be dicked down by an ex I'm gonna write about exactly what's coming to mind and what I'm feeling. People need to get over that misconception that women don't like sex. We love...well at least I love it. When it's with the right person. It's just good all around and we certainly get the same urges we're just not as obvious. But I've as I get older I've grown and learned that sex is just another facet of a relationship. It's great but it's not everything.

Posts from the BB

My final post for 2009. Since the lovely blockade of blogger at work I've had to be posting through through the BB. I love my BB but this shit aint easy.

I have a few posts I should have updated in November but that's fine ill do them in 2010. I just want to wish everyone a beautiful, prosperous, happy, healthy and safe new year. Dance a little dance, make a little love, be happy and live happy.

Spend time with those you love and who reciprocate that love but for the new year also remember to love yourself because truly that's 100% happiness right there, everything else is just brawta.

Allow Me to Introduce Myself...

I know for certain that what I wish for myself is greater than ill probably achieve but I can't help hoping. There are some times when life gets overwhelming and all I want to do is lay down and let it take over,let it run whatever course it wants to. Then I snap myself out of that and start dreaming the dreams I began to have when I realised that I could know more and be more than my economic status denoted. My mother is the greatest person I know because she never made me give up on myself. She knew there was so much more that I could achieve and she never gave up on that for me. I will love her forever for that shit because that instilled in me a belief system that cannot be shaken. There are many things my mom and I don't agree on but I thank God for her everyday because I finally understand what people mean when they say that someone made them who they are. She may not have carried me but she made me.

Perusing The Sartorialist for a few hours. I can't get over these outfits. If I be proactive I'm certain I could be and do more than merely exist. Right now I wear what I have, I don't try to do much with my outfits I just war what's convenient but I know I can spruce up my wardrobe, be more proactive in how I dress. I mean come on I have no fucking excuse. I refuse to conform but I'm certain that my own niche is there somewhere. It doesn't have to be expensive either. I'm a bigger girl and I find it hard to find clothes that not only fit but come in colors other than black, white and tan. I don't wish to look like a sausage but I can definitely do something more. I'm not big on the fashions that currently exist either so I'll have to try to go for timeless in my selections.

Though it's not my taste I've always found my friends to have amazing instincts when it comes to fashion. Axela can really create a great outfit that looks amazing on her tall figure. Eanehj as a bigger girl herself really can put an outfit together to highlight her greatest assets, from work to parties it's always perfect for her. Irrek-Nna always looks great to me, love her outfits, I like her taste in clothes which I think is kinda similar to my own. Arteip has a great fashion sense, I love that her quirkiness shows so strongly in her taste so her clothes have a little quirk and fit her really well. Akimat has some great clothes and shops merely by instinct for her it's perfect and it always works. I love that Assenav takes risks with her outfits not just with style but with color as well, wish I were as brave.

I really dont know much about fashion for that I leave it to @JhayOC and @dwaynefighter (check out his blog Don't Call me a Fashionista, you'll spend hours) but I know what I love and as usual I'm inspired so look out for...Trespasser Se7en.

Title Pic...

Engendrer et L'enfant

A few days ago I was sitting in a taxi contemplating what would be my next picture for my 365 twitpic project* when I look to my right and see this tall, brown, young Rasta man, very cute and he's standing alone holding these 2 babies. The youngest was months old maybe 5 or 6 and in a carrier latched to his body and the oldest he's holding in his arms, looked over a year maybe 2 years old. He's standing at the bus stop and it was so unexpected that I sat frozen in the taxi.. It was such a great picture. I wanted to capture it with my camera but could only take a snapshot in my mind instead. Its still there so beautiful and so profound. It was life and it was amazing.

Title Pic (gorgeous right?) -

Photo Credit

*I have been taking at least 1 picture a day and posting it to my twitpic page. I hope to go one year as a record of my entire year. I think it will be fun.

I Start...

'if we bottled love, it would be like peace and war in the same bottle, a cure for all diseases and the greatest biological weapon at the same time...'

I love that quote...It's such a perfect depiction of love. KP my friend wrote that in the comments of my last post. (LOVE HER!) It's so fitting. Love is so complex, so disastrous, so amazing. She asks if I'm really ready...I don't even know. The first thing I thought was 'YES! I'm more than ready!' but I'm uncertain. I'm ready for honest love, love that doesn't want to strangle you with sweetness I'm ready for it to be real. No sugar coating.


I watched (500) Days of Summer (review below) and one quote jumped out at me. The leads' friend is talking about his girlfriend he's had for years and he says something along the lines of his dream girl has bigger boobs and so on but his girlfriend is better than a dream she's real. That was the best quote of the entire movie. I didn't really feel much in the movie but I certainly felt that when he said it. I thought 'That's exactly what I want' I have no misconceptions about the people I will love and who will love me, I'll love who they are because they are real...they are...


I realize I haven't done a Weh Yu Mean? in ages so I'll just round up the goss I can and let loose, I'm also gonna do a Movies I Saw Last Week and throw in a !!Hot Guy of this Day!!... Here we GO!


So Weh Yu Mean?

• Busy, Busy, Busy...Paternity tests? Photocopying cheques for tabloid newspapers? This is where your life has gone? Weh Yu Mean? Men can't keep their dicks in their pants and women keep popping out babies like the world isn't spiralling out of control. Handle your business Busy just handle it...Do these entertainers have publicists? If not it's definitely needed.
• This Gully/Gaza foolishness has gone too far now. Since when did we turn into Israel and Palestine? How the fuck you attack someone for their opinions on music? Music? Weh Yu Mean? This shit is being thrown around in schools and that's the saddest thing ever. How can we be progressive when we fuck up our kids?
• Congrats to Tami Chynn and Wayne Marshall on tying the knot. Weh Yu Mean? The wedding looked beautiful and I'm happy they're happy.

I know very weak but my usual source for all things suss-ery seemed to have dried up (AKA the links aren't working) Oh well on to Movies I Saw Last Week.

(500) Days of Summer - Movie left me feeling pleasant, like a slight Christmas breeze, its a little sweet and refreshing but a little cold. I enjoyed it but wasn't bowled over not stating this is a bad thing just pleasant though. I was kinda able to go through it half a step ahead of the plot. Joseph Gordon-Levitt gave a performance I didn't really expect. Candid and emotional and based in reality. Pretty good. Zooey Deschanel was sweet and I identified with her character most. I liked the movie but it doesn't grab you I wasn't left wanting more I was left feeling pleasant which is better than most. I tried to love it but left merely liking it and kinda not wanting to see it again though I completely understand and feel it's appeal. 7.75/10

Madea Goes to Jail - I wish I could skip over this and say I didn't voluntarily watch it but I can't so I won't. I'm so tired of the Tyler Perry movies, so tired and yet I continue to watch and I have absolutely no cause to. The plot was all over the place and the acting was cringe worthy, if it wasn't over the top it was completely under par. The title of the movie is Madea goes to jail which she does in the last 15 minutes of the movie. What happened during the other parts of the movie you ask? I have no idea I was pretty much looking but not seeing, hearing but not listening during the entire thing. I laughed not once. Oh Tyler, Tyler Tyler... 3/10

Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist - I think Ive watched this movie at least 10 times now. I love it. I watch it over and over again because there is always a nugget of gold that I missed before. I practically know the dialogue word for word. Michael Cera is made for these quirky awkward I'm shy but confident roles. I loved it and him, Kat Dennigs was such a surprise Ive never heard of her before now so i had no expectations (for once) but she was very sweet very endearing perfect match for Cera's seemingly unchanging character. A little convoluted and the awkwardness of the characters can be a little challenging to follow but it works in the end. 9/10

Cadillac Records - There is no real standout character of the film. I loved the film for opening my eyes to a myriad of stars from the 40's, 50's and 60's stars I would have never known of otherwise. I was happy that it made me want to learn more about these people. The movie itself was slow to start and some of the actor;'s characterizations rather than being transformative were very distracting. If there was one person who did shine it was Columbus Short (featured !!Hot Guy of the Day!!) usually in movies he plays the hunky but dumb brother but I felt something from his character this time around. He pulled me in. I liked that the movie was about the people and not necessarily about the time but I would have loved some more inclusion of what the times were like then and the response the artistes received. 5/10

Sex Drive - The movie's abut a guy who goes on a trip to visit some girl he's been talking to online and all the things that transpire on that ride. It was not at all funny, the actors were...young and not very compelling. I cannot find one positive thing about this movie. From that I'm certain you can infer what my rating would be I refuse to put one.

!!Hot Guy of The Day!! is Jason Momoa (born Joseph Jason Namakaeha Momoa) hot guy of this day August 1, 1979.

Jason - j(a)-son\ is pronounced JAY-sun [Greek] means - healer. Mythology: the hero who led the Argonauts in search of the Golden Fleece

Joseph - j(o)-se-ph\ is pronounced JOH-sef [Hebrew] means - God Will Increase, May Jehovah add/give increase.

When my friend got married a few years ago I attended her wedding and as I sat in the pews watching her recite her vows looking up on the man she loves, her other half (he's her match perfectly) I teared up, something I never do over sappy moments. This was so much more real than anything I'd ever seen on TV and it was a thousand times better. Everytime I convince myself that I've never seen/experienced the real thing I remember that moment and the look of sheer happiness on her face as she said 'I do'. The wedding/marriage path has never crossed my mind as something I would consider for myself but I love seeing other people get married.. I love weddings because in that moment when vows are said in most cases love is so present that everyone around feels it.

I had intended to start this post with my night out with Akimat but I was reading the coverage of Tami Chynn and Wayne Marshall's wedding and it just magnified the feelings going through me after my night out. So Akimat's 5 feet 8 inches of uptown pretty, cute shoes and chic outfits. I am 5 feet 8 inches...that's about where our physical similarities end. We're friends because we're exceptionally similar in the way we think and our personalities work well together and when we go out I try never to compare myself to her because we are so different physically. I try to hold my own confidence I can't and don't want to be her so ill be the greatest person I can be.

Rambling aside we're out at club Bore* and we're sitting down looking around grooving a little and I look across the room and there's a group of guys standing facing us. At first. I don't really pay too much attention because as Akimat said quite fittingly it was a 'sausage fest', there were alot of guys so I couldn't really differentiate one guy from the next. I do eventually notice them though because one of them was just staring at us non stop. So I do the girl thing do a little shake and throw a surreptitious glance now and then to see if he's watching. I do that a few times and realize he's definitely staring. I realize that he's moved from the wall and walking towards us and immediately all sorts of butterflies let loose throughout my entire body not just my stomach. He's moving closer and closer and closer and...well you get the picture. I'm poised and ready to hear what he whispers and my body's tingling. He reaches us, leans over, and starts talking...to Akimat.

Yeah. I can't even describe what I felt. I was deflated. I beat myself up all the time about not using men to validate me because they definitely don't...at least not all the time. Last night though I felt like I really needed someone to say 'hey you look nice, you smell great...blah blah blah yakkity schmakkity'...the night went even further downhill from there...it just got me thinking about loving someone, being with someone I love and having them love me back. I am so ready, so ready.

You Know What...?

People try their damnedest to get the better of me but what I think they don't know or realize is that I'm not a pussy.

I don't adhere to pussy behavior and refuse to back down from actual pussies.

I WARN do.not.fuck.with.me.

Posts from the BB

I always get the question of why I don't go to church, I hate admitting it but I evade the question. I don't believe in church, I'm happy for those who have found spritual completeness in church but that's not what my experience is.

People worship in different ways and this is my chosen way. I worship God with just him and me. No one else needs to be involved. I will not knock the church experience but its for me, I don't know if this will change about me, I often think I'm looking for that place where I can worship with like minded folks but haven't found that yet and so I feel complete by myself and don't wish to join the church experience.

I love God but I'm no saint and those who pretend to be are funny to me but I refuse to take shit from anyone so any bible thumping bigots can step the fuck back.

I am who I am and choose to be no one else.

Posts from the BB

I am uncertain when the day came that I began to think of they as entities separate from me.

Listening to Sinead O'Connor 'Nothing Compares to You' and this type of emotion puzzles me,I'm not certain what it feels like and I crave it. I want to revel in it, this emotion that makes you feel the vibrations from these people. I stand aside and observe, I don't know what it feels like.

I've had relationships end badly, I recall some of those feelings but to me it always seems like people emote 100% more than I do. What I felt appeared to be only a snow cap to their icebergs.

I've felt anger but not rage, infatuation but not love, lust but not passion. The extreme of the emotion still eludes me and so I stand back, a curious observer wondering these feelings are, how can they be described or measured?

In a previous post I spoke about finding that grand passion, the soul tearing wish I'd never met you can't live without shit that make people go crazy. How does that happen? How do you get to that point? I can't see past that threshold much less to push past it. Maybe I just haven't met that person yet. I'm passionate about other things in my life but I feel like not being completely free with my emotions holds me back.

My will is too strong. I'm afraid of myself as that person, free of my imposed norms. I'm scared of what she might look like once she's out.

Posts from the BB

We Have. By tsagrednerp

He had me
This is truthful,
From his first stare,
To his tentative touch,
He had me
Before hello,
Before we met
Before time and the universe's dimensions

Through Earth's many lives,
The desert of space
It's his eyes
All in his eyes.
This transendental knowing
This knowing is beauty
This knowing is God's message

I have him
Inside and out
I have his truth
And in that I hold his soul
We are more
And together we have...
We have...

For Humans Only

I recommend you go see 'District 9', here's my review from when I saw it on Tuesday.

Allusions, metaphors, similes... all evident in the movie.one of the better adaptations certainly, the point is rammed down your throat as disgustingly as possible. Truly I did not want and will admit I didn't watch the terribly gross parts, I couldn't. My stomach and dreams are just not strong enough. Very nice characterization from the lead, he was featured during almost the entire film and you felt like you went through it with him. The connection you felt with him definitely increases the feeling of disgust, you feel as if you are there going through it with him. I didn't wanna watch but I desperately needed to know what happens next and this so where the movie shines.

Almost a surprise a minute and at the beginning it seemingly lags for at least 30 minutes before moving at breakneck speed. Unnecessary yet helpful the scenes of 'back story' at the beginning. I get it's important to our understanding of the plot but do we really need so much of it? Other than this the movie shines as a reflection on... wait can't give it away.Personally it makes me want to learn more about it. Its not just a film about aliens and humans. So do not go expecting great battles between good and greater. Its a very believable film, very true to life.

Documentary aspect is great, editing is outstanding, cinematography was pretty good (Joburg, especially slums, usually portrayed dreary and bleak in films and though this is shown there's a clarity to the picture that emphasizes more so than the dreary). The aliens looked believable and there was seamless integration of real and unreal. Some may not like it, it really socks it to you and some may argue that its portrayal of blacks was negative but that’s not what I saw AT ALL. As @dwaynefighter said it’s a thinker’s movie, it’s a challenge and you may be up for it or you may not but do not go expecting to merely skim the surface and enjoy it, you will be disappointed.

This is been a very nice movie summer, a few more to go and of course there'll be reviews.

Title Pic -

Photo credit - http://io9.com/5194949/district-9-debuts-first-alien+abuse-footage

G.I. JOE = G.I. NO!

Akimat and I haven't seen each other in some time, she's usually my go to gal for going out cause she's always up for it and we always have a good time. So we decide let's go to the movies and we decide to see "G.I Joe". I have never really seen an episode of the cartoon. I'm familiar with some of the names but mostly have no idea who anyone is. I actually thought there was a G.I. named Joe so...

The movie is 118 minutes long and truly there are maybe 2 scenes in which I didn't roll my eyes and were some what entertaining. One of the worst films I've ever seen. No joke. Channing Tatum was as flat as a pancake and I love me some Marlon Wayans but sweet minty Jesus where did his comedic timing go? Sienna Miller? The plot? The fucking dialogue? There were 1000 things wrong and as I said only 2 scenes were good enough to warrant a positive reaction from me. I understand and appreciate the use of animation within the film I mean it's based on a cartoon you're trying to keep that feel. Everything else was a big FAIL WHALE. Sexism is ripe and rampant but that doesn't seem to be any different than most other movies nowadays. I cant believe how bad it was. If there were a saving grace it would be Joseph Gordon-Levitt...not because of his performance but I have a HUGE crush. I would recommend you see it yourself to make your own judgement but you can't say I didn't warn you. For a supposed action film it was boring too. Weird right?

I also watched "Shaun of the Dead" last week for the first time (commercial filled and censored) but beggars cant be choosers.

Have I not said how much I love Simon Pegg and Nick Frost? They're a hilarious comedic duo. Love them. The movie was filled with so much goodness. From the zombies to Bill Nighy to Pegg's character unshaking need to go to the pub, all the way to the end where Frost's character is seen in the garden shed zombified but playing a video game. It was so very good and not just funny but entertaining and surprisingly emotional. Pegg played the role beautifully (tailor made for him) I believed his emotional displays from regret, sadness, horror and in his funniest moments just above hilarious. So well made. The camera angles, the script. so great. On my list for top zombie movies.

Going to see "District 9" tonight with Arteip should be good. You can be certain there will be reviews. Live, Love, Laugh!

Today's title pic -

Photo credit - http://hotcelebs.today.com/2009/07/14/