Saturday, May 17, 2008

Soothe the Beast

I forgot how much I loved the Donell Jones "Where I wanna be" album...I used to listen to it religiously. What happened to him? Come back Donell... J.Holiday and all 'em are just swagger jacking...
I watched all 6 seasons of Sex and the City because i didn't see any episode before season 6 and i really wanted to know what was up. I liked it...It was a good show and I just liked the whole chemistry between the characters. I'm awaiting the movie.
I want to be fabolous too...but the cheapskate in me cannot justify it. I can't buy a pair of shoes without feeling buyer's remorse wondetring if I couldn't get it for cheaper, wondering if I can't return it. I need more money to be as foab as Carrie.
The art of seduction...have a friend who's trying to become a master in seduction... Personally I think it's a load of crap. I think why do you want to play games with someone? if you're interested in the person and the feeling is reciprocated why do the run around, why spend, more like waste, time being coy, mysterious, crazy? Why not spend the time being open and real with this person? Why not try to develop a relationship based on who you really are? I feel like trying the seduction game makes him/her resent you in the end...Does it last...? Who knows... Does it work? So they say in my own opinion I think its all a form of manipulation. I hate being manipulated and I would never want to do that to another person. I'm just going to do me and I guess you can do you. Good Luck.

Today's title pic supm I picked up...

Thursday, May 15, 2008

can't you hear me...
why aren't you flinching?
SCREAm at me...?
trying to get free,
I'm trapped and you
are staring...
through me I think
because no man alive
would possibly survive
you're sitting right in front of me,
at you...
because of you.
you are so calm
I am screaing but you can't hear
no one can...


I am not a writer. I am merely a girl, a girl's girl...a girl's girl who looks like a lesbian. I'm cool with that... Don't care what people think about me but I do care what I think about myself. Lately I havent been liking me. In my head I say that i'm not lying to my friends it's true I am not avoiding you but in my heart there is some lying going on. To an extent sometimes I just wanna be alone or be with the two people who make me feel good about me lately. Make me feel like my input is needed. I'm sorry I don't want to be there for you now...I hate saying that.
I've been supportive all my life trying to make my self the person you can unload on. I've got some unloading to do myself but I feel that theres noone to turn to so I just go on turning and turning until I'm a tornado of emotions and baggae that noone can penetrate. I am alone in the midst of this storm and I don't see anyone trying to get in. That hurts. What you're all concerned about is the way I'm acting towards you and yes I know you are open but you're also judgmental, stubborn, elitist, I could go on... You hear what you want to hear and I can't have that around me now. I love you I do...and mostly I REALLY can't find the time to scratch my nose much less keep in contact but thats only part of the reason I'm away.
Sometimes I need to be away from you.
Title pic...

Sunday, May 11, 2008

May Days

Was gonna write supm got sidetracked and now only writing this so I can say I wrote supm in May... BOOOOOOOO! Longer post later I guess...

Titile so pretty...